Monday, October 19, 2009

don't call me

it's snowing. real snow now. like a the New England game kind of snowing...i have love/hate feelings
about it...that's all i dare to say...
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to help you hit rock bottom...
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and if that IS the case, i will be MORE than happy
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...unless you're at the "relapse" part of the cycle...
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Don't call me
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If you need help or support?
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*puts my hand on your shoulder, raises my eyebrow, slight frown, serious look* YOU'RE A GREAT
FRIEND & a GREAT PERSON...but i need U2 know:
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Don't say I didn't warn you...
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*looks very seriously through the crowd of my tweet loves*
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skittle
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one
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tell them i sent you ‐ for everyone that says i referred them, i get to have a visitor on Friday's for 15
minutes...and even BETTER!!!!:
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1‐800‐HELPMEICANTSTOPEATINGTHECANDY
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aaaaand...you're late...
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and you're on your way to their house...for dinner...and the birthday celebration...
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...no. tampons. ... ... and no birthday card for you mom... ...
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BAM! $20 DOWN, A CART of CANDY, a fresh prescription of SEROTIN adjusters, and of COURSE:
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...until you walk into Rite Aid or Walgreens and see what appears to say: "BUY ONE PACK OF "every
candy you like on the list" GET 738 FREE!*
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and then, the skittles will be gone...gone forever...
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Stear clear of the soda. The whole fluffy carbonation thing? ...gross. don't be stupid...find something
salty and go with your heart...
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This is the "FUTURE PROBLEMS OF CANDY ADDICTION PROBLEM" POINT. OF. ORIGIN.
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Accept and Welcome all steps. Even the canker love...it's so...yummy. Finish them. Tomorrow
whatever's left WONT. BE. ENOUGH:
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In my Expert opinion, lack of knowledge, child‐like behavior and love of candy & soda, I would
recommend the following:
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Carbonated. Acidic. Extra flavored light puffy ‐ creepy. Now you will smell them every time you
inhale for the rest of the day...
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CARBONATED. ACIDIC. EXTRAFLAVORED, yet light & fluffy...not the carbonation that makes your
eyes water...lighter. no residual iquid form
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myself and maybe you too...and if it's my lucky day, it'll go partially thru my nose...AWESOME.
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if you think it fun pretend you're CHALLENGeing or "daring" the soda "HEY, betcha can't explode in
my mouth & make me choke, spit all over
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Take a drink of soda after the LAST SKITTLE (remember, these are CRAZY CORES ‐ orange bag)
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TOP AUTHOR TIP
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...do this until they are gone... THE END
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if you score yourself some granule, go HERE: LATHER, RINSE, REPEAT as many times as needed
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swish ur tongue around, thinking u might find a couple hidden granules that would be so kick ASS to
crunch btwn ur top & bottom front teeth
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you swallow the last of the goodness
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the "SAND PAPER on the SLICED UP CANKERS, that have just been formed, sliced up and DOUSED in
an acidic river of sour yum flavor" stage
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.....through the pain...& you're chewing down to that last little collection of grainy sugary goodness,
and the last , exit stage starts:
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...but you JUST....... CANT...... STOP.......
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...all of the latter w the addition of itty bitty razor blade shards that CAUSE the trauma (cankers) &
then the slicing of the cankers...
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CRAZY CORE SKITTLES 1: so fkn yummy 2: ferocious salivation w BAM! flavor 3: after u eat 2 many
but can't stop, they exponentially become:
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Tuesday, October 13, 2009









Bedecked
by Victoria Redel




Tell me it’s wrong the scarlet nails my son sports or the toy
store rings he clusters four jewels to each finger.


He’s bedecked. I see the other mothers looking at the star
choker, the rhinestone strand he fastens over a sock.
Sometimes I help him find sparkle clip-ons when he says
sticker earrings look too fake.


Tell me I should teach him it’s wrong to love the glitter that a
boy’s only a boy who’d love a truck with a remote that revs,
battery slamming into corners or Hot Wheels loop-de-looping
off tracks into the tub.


Then tell me it’s fine - really - maybe even a good thing - a boy
who’s got some girl to him,
and I’m right for the days he wears a pink shirt on the seesaw in
the park.


Tell me what you need to tell me but keep far away from my son
who still loves a beautiful thing not for what it means -
this way or that - but for the way facets set off prisms and
prisms spin up everywhere
and from his own jeweled body he’s cast rainbows - made every
shining true color.


Now try to tell me - man or woman - your heart was ever once
that brave.